My First Real Prom

I am almost sure I went to prom in high school, but can't remember much about it or even whether I had a date. It couldn't have been much fun. And with three sons through school now, I seem to have able to avoid the whole thing... until today.
My eldest went to prom on Kwaj.  And Jake, being Jake, took care of any arrangements needed for ordering a tux and coordinating garment colors.  The corsage was ordered well in advance and shipped across the Pacific in a refrigerated container. Where in Kwaj, being Kwaj, it was completely acceptable to show up in island formal which means... anything goes. He went to prom by bike.

 My second son attended senior prom in Europe and informed me that he needed a well-fitted suit. I provided the money for the tailored suit and managed to get one shot of him as he left on foot with his friends.  I have no idea what his prom was like, but I am sure it included lots of alcohol. 
Now my youngest son is attending his senior prom in America's heartland.  Neither he nor I had any idea what this entailed.  But my husband is right, here in Minnesota Prom is like a wedding celebration.
Everything started months ago with people casually asking me if Ben was going to prom. As if I knew.  Then my son casually informed me that he had asked someone to prom.  That set the wheels in motion and my 'to-do' list was started. I couldn't have done this without the help of friends and family who would drop hints in a conversation at church or a forwarded email of what was next on the timeline. 
I had to go in to school and buy my son a ticket. Then I was told to go back and buy tickets for myself and Jon. We paid for reserved seating at the Grand March.???  Did this mean I was involved in Prom in some way? Did I have to dress up too?

This is when I realized that prom is really for the parents.  Like a wedding, we tell our children what is expected of them on the big day, meaning to insure they don't miss out on anything, but manage to stress them into conforming to expectations.
My son didn't want a tux, but I ended up renting one for him and making sure the colors coordinated with his date's dress. I ordered the corsage, and arranged for the pre-prom photo shoot. I have never ordered a corsage before and had no idea what I was doing. After asking me for as much information as could be imagined about my son and his date, the florist informed me that they only did white roses. I ordered the white roses... for $50.

There was a stressful eve of event when Ben began to see that his mother was in fact more involved with prom than he was. His mutiny played right into my hands when he suddenly decided to forsake the family's planned event at the farm and arranged for others to meet at our house. I provided food and Jon took pictures. We met the other parents and found common ground.
We all went round to the school where the students would board a bus to a party aboard a boat.  This "grand march" into the school drew quite a crowd. And we all followed the students into the gym to watch them promenade once again, with lots of posing for photos along the way.

 And just when I was beginning to feel like the whole event was just a ruse to make young people feel like they fit the mold, I saw a young couple doing their own thing. They wore plaid instead of a tux and gown, and proudly walked in while the crowd gawped.  As parents we are all secretly glad it isn't our child going to prom in jeans, but it was also a relief to see someone break the rules.
The strangest part for me was to find most of the boys wearing garters on their arms.  I was told this was an age-old tradition, but I still don't understand it.  And I am glad Ben didn't feel he had to wear a woman's garter to fit in.

So that was my first experience of an all-American hometown prom, and probably my last.  I am sure I will hear more about the actual party aboard the boat, and about the crazy Post-Prom party where the students are locked in a sports/activity center for the night to keep them from getting into trouble. 
I am glad my son, who is experiencing his fourth Jr/Sr HS in four different countries, is getting a chance to  have a real prom. He deserves a bit of fun!